Preparing to let go

We have been struggling some time with Max who is now blind, but things have become much worse. Max’s last seizure was different, he howled in pain, usually they are silent.

We think this seizure was painful and that it took its toll on his old fragile body. It seems to have injured his back and he has become very wobbly on his legs.

At 19 months old we saved his life and his sight with major brain surgery but it left him a neurological ticking time bomb.

We now struggle to keep his weight up and he has become very thin.We lost the battle for his sight over the last year and now he’s started to fall over. I worry what another violent seizure would do to him.

We have come to the decision that Max is no longer such a happy boy, he is the most peaceful when he’s sleeping on his Woof bed.

It is with a very heavy heart we have decided that, if the meds don’t improve things, the kindest thing we can do for Max is to put him to sleep .

We will be ordering Max’s poffin and when the time comes we will have a private cremation at the crematorium we took my first fur baby Buster to in Warwickshire.

Walks were the last thing for Max to enjoy but now it seems he doesn’t want to go with his painful back, we can just get him down the path to the field.

I knew when this puppy arrived that he would break my heart one day, when my last dog was put to sleep I said I would never do it again. Two years later Max stole my heart and needed a home and I gave this boy my heart to tear.

Little did I know there would be 12 operations £23K worth of vet bills and uncountable heart stopping moments where we thought he was going to die, but I wouldn’t have swapped him for anything.

He’s been pretty much everywhere we could take him and a few places we were not supposed to (shush thats our secret)!

He worked with so many of my clients and visited schools, probation centres, domestic violence refugees and he’s been an absolute joy for me and my clients despite the health heartaches.

The next few weeks and months will be hard as we come to terms with saying goodbye and finally let Max go. But I am comforted by knowing that we have given him the best life he could have had and he couldn’t; have been more loved.

I’ve already started to decrease work to make room for caring for Max but I will be taking some time out when we finally say goodbye to grieve as Max is not just my best friend and much loved family member, he’s also been my co-therapist and business partner.

Therapy servcies will resume and life will go on but I am sure friends, clients and supervisees will be understanding as to why my heart is heavy.

Death is as much a part of life as is birth, and the only thing that is inevitable, but with pets we often have to make the hardest decision of all as its often those faithful legs that follow us around that don’t last long enough..

Give your fur family a big cuddle and enjoy them and take plenty of photos and videos for the memories for one day they are all we have left. Well, sometimes only photos, for us we have the chunks out of the plaster as well, as we attempted to leave Maxy out of my therapy room. Well, that never happened as Max was determined to go where mummy does, and Maxy’s career as therapy dog began. Little did I know he would be the reason so many people booked their first sessions.

The unconditional love and acceptance of a dog is why we love them so.
It breaks my heat into a million pieces to even think of letting Max go.

As my tears fall, a river I know I will cry.
The hardest thing in life is to watch a loved one die